I know, I haven’t been here in forever but I’m here now. I’ll try to catch you up on all the things that’s going on with me and Naveen.
On Aug 28 he made 10 months, which is crazy because just yesterday he was a newborn and before that he was a bump in the belly and even farther back he wasn’t even a thought in my head. I never in my life imagined the little boy that I see beside me right now, I’ve dreamed of a son before but I never thought I’d actually have one because I couldn’t imagine myself as a mother. I don’t think I see myself as other people see me, inside I’m still the same person I was when I was younger, I have grown yes but I’m still essentially the same person, the person who used to dream of one day being an author or an artist, the person who thought the world of her own mother and never felt like she could be the same kind of mother. I know that I can never be like my mother, she is a hard worker who did what ever it took to make sure her kids were taken care of and fought for the rights of her kids, I can be that kind of person but in my own way. I’m nothing like my mother, my sisters, my aunts, or my cousins, I am me and I have to do things in my own way, now that that’s out of the way let’s move on to more important things like Naveen’s routine blood test for WIC.
On July 28 Naveen went for a blood test to check his blood level and to see if everything was fine, when we got the results back everything came back as abnormal, they told me it probably meant he needed iron and it wasn’t no bog deal but to make sure to show it to his pediatrician. His next Doctor appointment was on August 19 so I figured I’d give him some of that Poly-vi-sol vitamin just to be on the safe side. When his Doctor saw the results she was appalled, said it was way too low and that he’d need to go in for several blood tests to make sure that he just has low iron and not Sickle cell anemia. My heart just about dropped into my stomach, the thought of Naveen having Sickle cell and nobody even knowing at the hospital when he was born was a frightening thought. I was so worried, I couldn’t sleep, I would just watch Naveen and pray that everything was fine and he wasn’t sick. The tests were suppose to be very expensive and the little bit of money I have been able to make working went into diaper and wipes, sometimes clothes and lastly shoes for Naveen. I had no idea how I was going to pay for the tests, my mother said she’ll try to help with some but she didn’t have that much money anyway and I already owed her for the last Doctor appointment.
Thanks to Naveen’s Papa we had the money to go to the lab to get his blood tests done, it was $70 for the tests they did on Island and two other tests would be sent away to the states and I’d be billed.
On September 3rd we went to the lab, Naveen already hates this lab because he came here to take his first blood test which was just a finger prick, this time they were going to draw blood out a vein, the nurse brought out 4 huge vials and set about to take my baby’s blood, my mother didn’t think they should take all that blood from such a small baby and especially since he was very anemic, the nurse said it was Doctor’s orders but my mother put her shoe down and the head nurse had to come and she agreed that they didn’t need all that blood so they’d have to fill the vial only half way. The nurse stuck poor Naveen in his arm and attempted to get his blood but Naveen is a fighter and he was screaming and kicking and the blood just wouldn’t come out so we called a halt to it and asked for a refund since this nurse clearly didn’t know what she was doing. We went to the Doctor office and she gave us a referral for the do the blood test at the hospital where the nurses were more competent. So the next day we’re at the hospital to do the blood tests and I’m so nervous because I have no idea what this test will show, I hate to hear my baby cry and see them stick needles in his arm to take his blood. This time there are two nurses, one to help me hold down Naveen and the other to take his blood, it went so fast and they only took two small vials but it cost me $200. I’m fine with the $200 since they actually knew what they were doing and they were very pleasant.
Skip it to 2 days later and I get a call from his Pedi, he’s severely anemic and we have to start therapy right away. I think I was numb at this point, I just got up left the house and picked up his prescription to start him on his Iron supplement. He’s taking 1 ml daily for a week then 2 ml for a week, then 3 ml the next week all the way up until he is taking 5 ml. The first day he took his iron was not easy, I tried to mix it with water and he absolutely refused to drink it so I ended up having to mix in some juice and he drank it with no problem. I have no idea if it’s increasing his iron levels yet but I have noticed an increased appetite, he now eats more table food than he was before, it’s not a nibble or two and then leave. We have another Dr. appointment next week Friday, guess we’ll see if he has gained any weight and they’ll send us for another blood test.
Now about his birthday….
Next month my baby will be 1 year old and I have nothing, no invitation, no theme, no plans, nothing. I know he won’t remember any of it but it feels like such a failure that I can’t even give him some cupcakes and a plate with his favorite character on it. I’m so depressed but I don’t show it because I have to be strong for my son and do the things he does need like iron supplements and blood tests. Hopefully I can at least give him a cupcake with a number 1 candle…