My C-section experience

Welcome back!

Today I’m going to talk about my C-section experience.

When I found out I only had two options either attempt a breech birth or have a C-section I was numb, I researched breech births like crazy and they are such a gamble. “What if my baby’s head got stuck in pelvis?” this was the biggest question on my mind and I just wasn’t comfortable with the idea that it could happen.

I asked my husband what he thought the C-section was the better choice.

It was decided, I’d have a C-section, sure there was a chance that the baby could turn down on her own but there was a bigger chance of me going into labor with her still being breech. A scheduled C-section was the way to go.

February 20 and we’re in the hospital for a routine check-up, they check to see if baby had turned but she was still breech, here is where it gets crazy…

The doctor calls in for me to have my C-section tomorrow!

I thought I would have more time to get used to the idea and read up on after care and all that but no, they just drop that bomb on me.

I’m not going to lie but I cried, I was scared, I had to stay in the hospital and wait for my C-section.

There I was in a room all alone with so many thoughts going around in my head. I was not expecting this and I didn’t know how to handle this situation. I tried to relax as much as I could and get some rest.

It’s the next day and I’m waiting for my husband to arrive, the nurses came into the room and wheel me down to check if baby is still breech, she’s still in her cozy spot under my ribs, I’m wheeled back to my room and told to shower with Betadine.

I’ve showered and in the hospital gown when my husband and mother-in-law arrive, now we wait for them to take me to the Operating Room.

We wait and we wait but nobody is coming, finally in the afternoon someone comes and says that there were emergencies so my C-section won’t happen today. I’m spending another night in the hospital alone.

Here I am again, another morning full of nerves waiting to get taken to my first surgery, nurses come and go, I’m waiting for Marvin to arrive, I’m terrified of being taken to the OR without him, a nurse comes to the room and tells me I’ll go in the afternoon, all I can do is sit and watch the clock.

Marvin walks into the room and I’m relieved, I won’t be alone after all! I let him know that they said the operation was going to be in the afternoon. So we wait.

A little after noon two male nurses come to wheel my bed down to the OR, they take me down corridors, into the elevator, and finally to the OR waiting room, Marvin wasn’t allowed in and I wouldn’t see him again until I was taken into the actual OR.

While I’m in the waiting room the nurses are asking me questions and getting me ready for the operation. All this time I don’t know where Marvin is or if I’ll see him before the C-section.

The nurses transfer me from my bed to this table like gurney and wheels this into the OR, I see Marvin and the nurses start prepping for the surgery.

It’s time to get the spinal and I’m shaking, it’s a needle in my spine, with my needle phobia I’m a wreck. I have to bend really far forward and they warn me that I’d feel a prick. It was like a bee sting, this was followed by pressure and they lay me down. I started to feel a cool sensation in my lower region, my feet felt heavy but I could still wiggle them a bit. I was scared I was going to feel them cutting into me.

Up went the curtain, a cap was placed on my head, oxygen was put into my nose, I felt detached from my surroundings. I guess somewhere in my floating they placed a catheter because I did not feel it at all.

I’m just there watching the blue curtain and occasionally feeling a tug on my body when I hear a baby cry, I’m almost in tears but I hold it in. I cried enough.

They bring her around the curtain and place her next to me.

My daughter, she was out, the first thing I thought was that I wouldn’t feel her head in my ribs anymore.

Now they’re going to stitch me up, I watch Marvin walk off with the baby and it was back to staring at the blue curtain until they finished. They roll me out of the OR and quickly transfer me back to my bed.

They want me to move my feet but they won’t cooperate. I feel like I’m in Kill Bill, I kept telling myself wiggle your big toe. I’m not sure how much time passed but finally I could move my toe and then my feet, once I could move both my legs it was back to my room.

Once back in my room I see Marvin and Oyanie waiting for me.

I’m still not feeling my lower region completely and a nurse removed the catheter, I’m supposed to get up and pee on my own.

My legs feel like rubber and they’re shaking like crazy but I managed to stand up with the help of the nurse, I’m unable to pee so she makes me drink a lot of water and promises to return in an hour.

A hour passes and the nurse is back, she helps me stand again and once more I try to pee, this time it’s a success.

During all of this my incision is painful and I’m taking all the meds they give me.

I can’t help but compare it to my vaginal delivery and wish I had been able to have another one.

She’s Breech!

I originally posted this on my Facebook page so I’m reposting it here.

Hey guys, I was going to write this post like two days ago but my baby seems to hate sleeping at night right now and I’m seriously suffering from sleep deprivation. It’s afternoon and I’m still in bed where she’s laying on my chest finally sleeping. Since she made a month she’s been in a growth spurt and I know it won’t last long but for now it’s rough.

So, today I’m going to talk about finding out that my baby was breech and going for a ECV or External Cephalic Version. A ECV is where they try to flip the baby by pushing on your stomach. ECVs are not always successful and there are risks involved but you can say at least you tried.

I was about 36 weeks when I heard the word siège, I didn’t know what that was so when I got home I googled it. Bébé en siège is the French term for a breech baby, I already knew that she wasn’t head down because I could feel her head on my left side and in my ribs when she turned. Let me tell you feeling baby’s head in your ribs is not pleasant at all. Sometimes it felt like she was pulling my ribs apart. I avoided laying on my stomach because that made the pain worse.

So my baby is breech, I had four options, try a ECV, wait for baby to turn down by herself, attempt a breech birth, or go for a C-section.

We opted to try the ECV, I was 37 weeks at that time, I went into labor at 37 weeks with my son so I was a little afraid that I’d go into labor before the ECV. Baby stayed put and we went to the hospital, they had me change into a gown and lay on a hospital bed. I was given pain meds because an ECV can be uncomfortable.

The doctor came in and tried to explain to me what she was going to do, my French isn’t the best so I didn’t get everything but I understood the gist of the situation. She verified that baby was still in breech and attempted the ECV. It was painful, she dug her fingers deep into my stomach and tried to turn baby but because baby was tucked up into my ribs she couldn’t move her. I was so happy she didn’t try again because I didn’t think I could take that pain for a second time.

They kept me for an hour or two after so that my stomach could stop contracting. Going into labor is one of the risks of doing a ECV.

With this failed ECV I only had three options left, wait for baby to turn on her own, attempt a breech birth, or have a C-section.

I was terrified of having a C-section and the risks of a breech birth was scary. I went home and tried all kinds of exercise that was supposed to help baby turn down but none of them worked. My baby was content to be up in my ribs and I knew that I would most likely end up having a C-section.

Catching up

Hey guys, like I promised I’m going to talk a little about everything that’s happened since my break from writing.

Today I’m going to talk about being diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes.

So I never had to do the glucose test with that awful drink, with my Hyperemesis Gravidarum there’s no way I’d have been able to do it, instead I had to do a blood test and when we got the results my midwife said the sugar level in my blood was pretty high which could indicate Gestational Diabetes. She was going to ask a colleague to take a look and that was that.

About a week or two weeks later I had an appointment at the hospital and there I was officially diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes. I was shooked. Here was this nurse telling me I had to stick my fingers 4 times a day and check my blood sugar before and after eating and I couldn’t eat a lot of my favorite foods. I have a deep fear of needles so this was not something I was looking forward to or even sure I would be able to do. My only relief was that I didn’t have to inject myself with insulin just try to maintain the Diabetes with a diet change.

So off to home we went with a bag full of items I’d need to check my blood. I felt defeated like I was already suffering from Hyperemesis and pubic pain and now my body was punishing me with Gestational Diabetes. Like everything else in this entire pregnancy I had no choice but to get on with it because my baby needed me to do it and I was not going to lose this baby too.

The first week was hard, I was so afraid of the needle that I asked Marvin to do it, he complied and I felt like the biggest wuss. It wasn’t painful at all but I will wasn’t sure I could do it myself but I had to because Marvin had to work and I had to check my levels before and after lunch.

I had to get over my fear, I learned to just go with the flow and prick my finger, it really wasn’t that bad after all.

The diet change was the toughest part of this thing, I couldn’t eat this or that and sometimes I’d get a spike in blood sugar eating something that was fine the previous day. I have never eaten so many green things in my life, so many unsatisfying meals.

The following week we were back in the hospital and I was put on insulin, my worst fear realized, I would have to inject myself with insulin. You have no idea how much this terrified me, I would literally shake while trying to inject myself that I was afraid I’d break the needle in my skin.

Like with the finger pricks I had to do it and I gradually became a pro at it.

In the end I can say it was worth it as Oyanie was born at a good size and had no blood sugar issues.

I’m Back!

It’s been a while since I posted on here. Let’s do a quick recap of all that has happened.

• Found out I had Gestational Diabetes
• Found out baby was breech/transversal
• Was put on insulin
• Tried to change baby’s position, it failed
• Had a C-section
• Country went into lockdown

As you can see it’s been a pretty wild ride. Since we are in lockdown I’ll be writing about each of these instances with a little more information.

Here’s to the coming weeks of isolation and writing!

Aches and pains

Hey everyone!

I’m 21+1 today and feeling all the kicks and punches, stretches and rolls. My son recently got to feel the baby move and he was awe struck lol he asked me if I could feel it. Baby hasn’t cooperated for Papa yet but I’m sure he’ll feel the movements soon enough.

Aches and pains have blossomed in the form of round ligament pain in my pelvis. I’m in pain turning over in bed, walking, going up the stairs, basically anything. I’m hoping to get a pillow for between my legs to help with this pain.

We did find out that I’m having a girl which I’m excited and nervous about, thinking about all the hair fights I’m going to have to deal with!

Speaking of hair, I shaved my head again, not as bald as I was before but enough that I didn’t have to struggle to take care of it. I was really down about it’s state after my sickness and just decided a fresh start is what I needed.

I’ve been walking to the park with my son more since he’s on vacation and I think it’s doing me some good. I’m no longer super tired and run down when I get home but I am out of breath sometimes. I try to rest when we reach the house and let my body relax.

Things are going well for the meantime so I’ll end this on a good note.

Until next time!

Update

Hey guys,

I know I haven’t shared an update in a while so here it goes.

I’m doing much better HGwise, I’m what you’d call medicated fluffy, I don’t have any nausea or vomiting unless I eat something that doesn’t agree with my belly. Since about 10 weeks I’ve only vomited once after eating a banana that didn’t sit well. The only downside is I’m still suffering from lack of energy. When I go out I have to sit or I feel like blacking out. If I can’t sit I stoop down until the feeling passes. It’s really unpleasant and makes going out difficult since I don’t go anywhere for the whole week.

I’m now 16 weeks 5 days, on Tuesday I’ll be 17 weeks.

I’m slowing getting there, by belly isn’t that big as yet but I’ve already started wearing maternity clothes.

I’m experiencing round ligament pain and Braxton Hicks which is no fun, some heartburn, excessive drooling especially at night, I wake up multiple times to clean my face and shoulders. I sleep on my back and that doesn’t seem to help any.

Even with all these complaints I’m so grateful that my medication works and I’m not back to the all day nausea and vomiting because that’s no fun at all.

Back to School

Hey guys,

Yesterday my son went back to school and it was both awesome and horrible.

Usually I walk him to school, pick him up for lunch, drop him back, then pick him up after school.

I walk for all of this but since I got pregnant I’ve not been able to walk very far or for very long which proved to be difficult for the coming school year so my husband and I decided Naveen would eat lunch in school this year saving me the lunch trip but that left dropping and picking up. In the end it was decided my husband would drop him and pick him up.

That left me free from doing anything which would be too difficult.

Except now I have nothing to fill my time and I find myself wishing there was something to do. I tried watching a little TV, working on the computer, reading a bit but I wound up just tiring myself and ended up taking naps throughout the day until it was time for both Naveen and Marvin to come home.

First ultrasound

I recently went for my first ultrasound, no waiting for 12 weeks after all!

I was measuring at 10 weeks 3 days which is about two days ahead of what my app Nurture calculated.

They do things a little different here in France and have me another set of measurements which is considered theoretical 11 weeks 4 days. From what I understand they add a week or two from last menstrual date because predicting when implantation occurred is just not possible.

So here is baby O at 10w3d.

Naveen was present for the ultrasound so he got to see his little sibling playing in my belly, he was so excited to see it on the big screen and hear the heartbeat.

I’m glad he was there to see if because he wasn’t really believing there was a baby, he kept asking if my belly got bigger.

Health wise I seem to be having some fluffy weeks with occasional nausea that ranges from not so bad to I can’t move. I notice that the bad nausea always occurs when I’m up and about too much. I tend to take a rest and feel a little better.

I hope these weeks continue to be fluffy because I feel a little more human when I can function.

The week to pass

I’m 7 weeks today, the same amount weeks I was when my life shattered in 2015. I wanted to wait until I passed this mark before sharing but life always has other plans.

Graphic thanks to Nurture App by Glow.

If you’re interested in the Nurture app you can find it on the Play Store here.

Things are so different now, I have insurance, my French is apparently good enough that I can speak to hospital staff, I am on a very strong medication, Largactil which is the last step before hospitalization and IV drugs.

And yet…

I am filled with doubts and dreading the thoughts of something bad happening, the vivid dreams are not helpful either.

Now more than ever I wish I was home where I’d be surrounded by family and love instead of stuck in my bedroom while my 5 year old takes care of himself. I worry about him see much and trying to get up to check on him is a fall down the stairs waiting to happen. So many times I’ve gotten dizzy or nauseous and had to sit before I could continue.

I’ve successfully passed 7 weeks!

I’m now 9 weeks and 3 days, I think I can feel my uterus starting to peek out from behind my pelvic bone. Nothing big just that little feeling of firmness.

Soon my little baby will start looking like a baby and I’ll have my first ultrasound, I can’t wait for that, the days seem to drag but at least I have something to look forward to.

Stuck on Sick

It’s official, I’ve been stuck on bed rest since 4w5d and I’m now 6w5d. I’ve passed every hour of every day either throwing up, stuck on a continuous loop of nauseated, or sleeping the sleep of the undead.

Yes, we’re pregnant again and yes I’m suffering once more from Hyperemesis Gravidarum.

I knew better, I knew I would never be able to experience pregnancy like a happy person, I knew I’d be sick every waking hour. I have so many boxes and boxes of medications and I’m still so sick.

My lips are dried and peeling, my skin is dry as is my hair.

This is my third pregnancy dealing with this and I don’t know what I was hoping for but I definitely didn’t find it. I’m so close to the mark where we lost the last one that I just decided to come out with it.

If you’re local to me chances are you will not see me again until after the birth. I can barely climb the stairs in my own home.

I don’t know who you are unborn baby but I’m trying everything I can to meet you.